I mean besides going to heaven and meeting a bunch of hot guys/girls to spend eternity fucking or something (i don't know. i'm not well educated on faith, what is heaven?) what do you have planned for your afterlife?
and even besides that, what do you want done with your body? It may seem out of line for me to ask this of a young and lively person such as yourself. But really, who can say for certain when death will come upon you? it might loom over you, and take you slowly, or maybe you won't ever know it's there. sometimes it's sure and swift, others fickle. your fate is the same whatever your way of going will be. you'll lose your 21 grams and breathe your last breath. So think about what will happen to your body. I enjoin you to do so saying this because i think it's in your best interest. death can be terrifying, with such large uncertainties. Ultimately there's not avoiding it. death = inevitable
First there is the tombstone option. if i had one i might want it to look like this . (credit toPaul Snowden and thanks. this photo motivated the post) but really that is the last thing i want. Ideally, I would like to be dumped into the ocean to be used as nutrients by whatever might happen upon my rich and labile flesh. Perhaps in a favorite ocean spot of mine. Right now i'm pretty sure it'd have to be in the Monterey Bay. i'm not even sure that will change as time goes on but i hope to get intimate with many more oceanside locales. ANYWAY, i'm not even sure that's legal so i guess i'll settle for being creamated on. or could i just be buried somewhere without marking? whatever way allows my nutrients to be passed on. burning is not ideal, but I feel comfortable with my certainty of knowing at this time. A contradiction in what i previously stated and know to be true. is this me imagining my own invincibility? they say a lot of young people are affected by feeling that way. or it could just be me knowing what's important and what's not.
more about death though, why all the agony over it if it's inevitable to everyone. I would prefer to treat it as more of a natural thing, find a different way to mourn. and stop putting people in boxes everywhere underground. I'd rather be spread all over than six feet under. oh damn maybe a new thing to do (on a hefty mental list of things to do) should be to make things for people to remember me by when i die. but not something stupid. lol. something charming but a bit messed up. but i'm pretty sure i'd want that to be decomposable too if left to nature.
by the way, I think now would be a good time to mention that the work I do, and things i learn about, biogeochemical cycling, asks us to carefully examine the ways certain molecules and elements are utilized throughout living, nonliving and detrital (organic waste) phases of chemical cycling. so i think it's really important to recognize those pathways of nutrient transfer and respect them. Truthfully I had my mind set on this years before i began learning about biogeochemical cycling, but it's all appropriately relevant and even delightful to think about. I try to tell people and remind my mother every once and a while so that someone remembers. I don't think that i'll be any particularly special or large contribution to an environment but the organisms will make the best of my death just like i do my best to with this life.
lastly I'll say that i've yet to have any close encounters with death myself or with the people i love and even like. I have a lot to learn and my words may be shaken with what i endure. i know i am just beginning to develop a secure perspective on death.
Most importantly, preparing for and thinking about death for yourself is something important i believe you should take time to think about. i also thought it was important to talk about how i feel because... i'm really into people sharing their personal experiences and viewpoints. but... not really for a long time if you're stupid. (certainly a blog topic all of its own)
SO thanks for reading <3
it's now 4:09 am. i've got insomnia and stayed up all night writing about death.
i had to laugh as i was finally getting to the end of this because i remembered a period when vince would always promise to write people essays on things he feels he should prove, and i also been in a few discussions with him about this. he said something like, "someone should make a chart of IQ v. time spent thinking about death" well we were both too lazy to actually do it.. point being- it's real. it's relevant. does this count as my "i'll write you an essay...."?
2 comments:
At your funeral, music of choice- bright eyes lollolz
If I die a healthy women I want to be harvested for body parts and science.
maybe you are dead but your kidney is being used by a women in Milwakee who had kidney failure!
interesting
haha thanks. that's nice to think about. I'd like to add that I think there are certainly a lot more ways to think about death here than I mentioned. everyone has their own way but this is one.
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